I rarely feel overwhelmed. Today I do.

There are simply too many things going around my head, too many things on my to do list and too many problems I have to solve.

Tomorrow my Decree Nisi is read. Strange that you don't have to be there to hear it. I can imagine the judge spends the entire day rolling his eyes around, dispensing yet another statistic in the pile of broken marriages and adding to the single parent ratio of the country. All across the UK will be people delighted, relieved or miserable.

I wonder how many hundreds of others will be sitting awaiting their bit of paper. You would think in 2010 they could email it. By 2060 you will be able to get married online, should marriage still exist. I somehow doubt it.

The Decree Nisi seems a little worthless, no more than a rubber stamp in agreement of principle. Still, it is that one step closer.

I am desperately trying to find a way of ensuring the children do not get uprooted further, it is no easy task and definately in the face of adversity. Having the childrens future be dependent on me, is simply mind blowing overwhelming. I have cut back everything to the core and realised that no matter where we live - the bills will all be fairly similar. Problem is that in all the time I am looking and trying to come up with solutions, I am not actually earning anything. If I didn't have the children, I could work any hours I wanted. Ironic really.

I also have the Sendist tribunal this week. I finally managed to borrow the thousand pounds to pay for Educational Psychologist and simply added to the costs that appear to go with getting divorced. It is an absurd situation - the amount spent on lawyers will ultimately have been enough to buy a one bed flat in Norfolk. Apparently some people get divorced online for a mere 250.00. Oh for life to be that easy. If it carries on, I really will be looking at Norfolk.

So the tribunal is adding to my stress. I have a wireless printer. Only it is not working. I have to figure out how to get it working because I have to print off 450 pages of tribunal 'bundle'. Without it I am even more stuffed. I spent 4 hours today trying to figure it out. The only thing I learnt was that I am not technologically minded and I am still stuffed.

In the midst of this, I cooked 2 Sheppards pies, 1 Bolognese, 1 Moussaka and 2 lots of meatballs. Oh, that was forgetting the Cardoman encrusted roast dinner. I feel I have fully passed the course on how to produce some really boring meals using mince. It is now 11pm and I still have to freeze it all, clean up, make three lots of sandwiches and clean the bathroom.

The mouse on the computer is broken and now I have no right click. It only works if you take it out of the USB thing at least onve every 2 minutes. My laptop charger has died and the replacement one had disappeared in the post. The televisions still do not work and the light in the bathroom has gone for the 4th time in a month. It's back to candles. To top it all, the exhaust on the car seems to have an issue. I have exhaust fumes from the middle of the car and people keep thinking it is on fire. So did I the first time it happened, but I feel a little more accepting of it now. It is not on fire, I cannot do anything about it and shall simply continue to do nothing.

The teenagers bike is almost unrideable. All of the panels have now fallen off and yesterday it broke down acrooss the middle of an extremely dangerous junction. I am on the verge of running it over myself. I wish I had stuck to my original idea of not buying him one. He is as sick of it as I am.

Overwhelmed is not good.