Today I was a PR consultant. I drank latte and and discussed sales figures. Not only did I discuss sales figures, I asked questions of production turnarounds. I barely recognised myself. The woman I was speaking with was certain that she recognised me. I have never seen her before in my life. This is fortunate as had she seen me before, she would recognise that I was in fact - making it all up.
Actually, I wasn't entirely making it all up but since words have never before left my lips, I felt like an almighty fraud. Still I have inordinate gratitude for the friend that appears to have faith in me and is determined to make me believe that I can achieve more than I think I can. Even this is not strictly true. I think I can but I avoid trying, just in case I am wrong and in fact, I can't.
Life is made very complicated by the thought processes that I have.
I had another, equally gorgeous friend do something truly lovely today. As I rushed into school in a suitably fake PR Consultant kind of way - she shoved a piece of paper in my hand. Having assumed it was a flyer, I threw it in the car. Only later did I realise that it was in fact a mini Spa Day. I am bowled over. No reason apparently, she just thought I deserved it.
Sometimes friends put your own friendship skills to shame. I am surrounded by people who have the capacity of generosity that I could never match. There is a possibility that she simply thought I was looking a tad rough or thought, perhaps that my eyebrows joined. I would hope to have noticed had she been staring at me for inordinate periods of times. A mutual friend of ours pointed out that I had in fact, got odd eyelashes. Great
I do however, accept that I am an entirely odd person and feel certain that most people that meet me, will never meet anyone quite like me again. I am not entirely sure whether this is a good thing or not. Perhaps this is my USP, I am a worm inside peoples head.
Yesterday, on the way back from the tribunal, the Educational Advocate that has been representing in the 'Fight the LA case' subjected me to 30 minutes on what I do not need in men. I recognise that everything he said would be quite correct for a sensible person, I also recognise that I rarely want what anyone else wants and this puts me at a disadvantage. My ability to compromise is well documented.
It also is a great sauce of irritation to my friends. Fiercely protective, there is now a general consensus of the type of male that would be appropriate or sufficiently balanced to be worthy of my affection. I have pointed out that there are very few stomach clenching 'stop you in your tracks' men around and I fail to see the point in men for the sake of it. Certainly not at the Gym, where they appear to be all GP referrals but apparently 'stop you in your track' kind of men are not the kind of men they have in mind. All very plausible and correct but all they get is my glazed expression. I fear they may have a secret desire to punch me.
For the special individual that gave me the Spa day. You now what goes on in my mind without the need for my words and I am ever indebted to your understanding and lack of judgement. I suspect this may mean you are as insane as I.
Perhaps this is why you are such a good friend X
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