Chemistry, Instantaneous Karma or slowly evolving

Have had food for thought today.

I sent the afternoon with a great friend and two single male chums and their children. We barbequed, made food and sat around drinking wine.

It caused some pondering. What happens when there is someone in your life that clearly cares very much for you, would never willingly hurt you and that they when they look at you, there is more in their eyes than just friendship. What you are looking at is real feelings.

So what happens when you have told yourself that you are simply incapable of compromising on chemistry and that stop you in your tracks moment, is your guiding force of what is right from that point on.

What happens if you are sure you could never meet anyone that gets the way you think, that can articulate at the speed you can, is cuttingly astute and capable of the level of emotions that you feel. Then you meet them. You discover that the moment feels so rare that they then have the power to cut you to pieces. It's a real bitch when they do. Does accepting you may have been wrong mean compromising?

So which is better, the man that still causes a physical reaction every time you see him despite the pain he caused, or the man that you know is not entirely sure about anything you say but you know when he looks at you, that he cares deeply.

Buggered if I know the answer. I do know that when someone looks at you like that then physical closeness would take the snap of fingers. It's compelling. I also know that when you are questioning the basis of healthy emotion, then you are likely to cause them huge pain. Having been on the end of that scenario, I have no wish to subject someone who cares about me - any such pain.

Just when you thin you have the answers to everything, it seems that you have none.