There is a certain monotony to my life. Having only prepared half of the stuff needed to get out of the house - I have given up and retired to bed with my feet throbbing. It pains me greatly to have to set the alarm clock for 6.30am knowing that despite the fact that this is an ungodly hour, it still will not be enought to get to school on time.

Last night when I went to bed, I covered myself in Clarins body products (thankyou to the chum that gets the invitation to the charity sale) and realised that actually, I quite like being on my own. I think this is good. I have stopped looking at every man that walks within a five mile radius and decided that slavvering CLarins all over and going to bed with the Sunday Times magazine (albeit 2 weeks old) is quite heartening. I forsee a future of stubbly legs and many cats.

On the subject of heartening - When I was about 8, someone asked me what my favourite item of food was; I had no hesitation in naming the humble potato. With young logic I knew that I could saute, mash, roast, boil, fry or turn it into salad and for that reason - I would have enough options to avoid the tedium of the same food each day. So it was ironic that today the humble potato was dedicated to me.

I have a friend, well known in Bradford for her culinary skills and catering. This diva of the kitchen has a blog of hearty family based recipes and is written in a 'Come sit around the hearth whilst I pound Cardoman' kind of way. So I am perusing her offerings when I come across instruction for sublime baked potatoes. A script to me at the start and ending with:

Don't you feel better? Eat all alone. You were too good for him, anyway

I was very moved. I shed a tear at the start and laughed very loudly at the end. No matter what happens in life, you always have the potato. Life is sustained with the spud. You have a potato and friends that think of you when you are not standing in front of them - then life has to be good.

There are those that always thinks of you and others that always talk of you. I discovered this today courtesy of Freecycle. Last week I put an advert on the site for a book on seperation and divorce. Clearly I now need to know the stages you have to skip through in this process and it seemed appropriate to read about it. I did add in the body copy 'This should be enough to get tongues wagging' and indeed it has. Apparently I am now filing for divorce. I know this because a friend told me and someone told her. By the time it had got to her, there was no mention of wagging tongues but more of 'grateful for support'.

Now I do live in a small area, tongues wag and that is part of the charm of living where I do. Yet there was a little annoyance. I for one am very good at adding 2+2 and gainingg 4. Most people I know come up with 7.

I decided that there was only one way of dealing with the chinese whispers and so I did what any responsible person would. I posted a wanted ad for an Ovulation Predictor Kit.

Now that should get the tongues wagging