Sunday, 5 July 2009

Crisis. In the space of a mere two hours I have gone through near nervous breakdown to tears, a date and another near nervous breakdown

It started with the mobile phone, that broke. I was trying to make a chocolate mousse at the time and in the midst of trying to download texts from a screen less phone, I turned the cream into butter (twice) and spend 30 dollars on a download that I didn't need. By the time I rescued the dessert and tried with help from my life Guru(Whilst receiving life counselling at the same time as trying o reconfigure the phone) I was in no mood to party. However - a chocolate mousse had been promised and at 10.30pm, clutching an extremely dense chocolate mousse, I arrived.

By this time I had given up caring about the phone. If I die without all my text evidence it won't make my death any more final. My failed promise to deliver the dessert was of more pressing importance and at least this was delivered, albeit long after the food had been digested.

So my first solo venture to a couple like party. The music was the music that it and I shared a love of and it totally threw me. By the time they were redoing "Ever fallen in Love with someone you shouldn't have" I felt more than a little thrown and had to sneak outside for nicotine inhalation in a bid to compose myself. The tracks were indeed , a tad ironic.

By midnight I had inadvertently pulled. Totally unprepared, when a nice man asked for my phone number and enquired as to whether I would like to go for a drink - I was flummoxed. Having no idea what to say, I said

"That would be lovely" and continued with my number, knowing all along that there was no attraction at all and I really did not want to go for a drink.

Now I feel dreadful and want to die of embarrassment. The last thing I expected in my mad dash to deliver a chocolate mousse was to be asked out. Having given it no thought, I had been totally unprepared for being asked for my phone number. In the last few weeks I had been totally prepared for never being asked for my phone number and now I have given it to someone that I don't actually want to go out with. I want to curl up in a ball (after I have changed my number). Having told myself that the Body God was simply not meant to be - I realise how that in fact, it felt like it was meant to be.

I am not sure about all this. I think being single is far easier. I am never going out and I am never, ever answering the phone again

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